Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Because I can

Since blogs are the electronic form of ego, I thought it most appropriate that I post these comments from my two daughters on the occasion of Father's Day. They represent the thoughts of two young, beautiful women who are on the cusp of a new direction in their lives, and are good life markers to remember. Both are from the cards they gave me.

From Corey, who will be marrying Justin this coming October:

Happy Fathers Day, Dad-O! You deserve this day and 100 thousand more for all you've done for me. A girl couldn't ask for a better, more supportive (and, of course, more handsome and cool) father than you. I so appreciate you and all you've done and I'm very happy to have you. In short, you are awesome. I am lucky, and I enjoy living in every moment with you. Thank you for being you.

From Rachel, who will be entering her first year at UVA this fall:

Dear Daddy,
As I've always told you, you're my favorite father! Seriously though, I feels so incredibly lucky to have you. Some of my personality is due to my independent thought, but it is impossible to imagine that I would have been 100% the same person had it not been for you. You've taught me so many things over the past 17 (almost 18) years of my life. I've learned how to think critically, be self-aware, be honest, be curious, and not afraid to think about things that challenge what I believe. I've come to appreciate these things (lessons) even more, two months before I head off to college, because they will be challenged like never before. I really feel confident about the person you've helped shape me to be, even if I have my moments [grin], and I could not be more proud to have you as my father. I love you.

I'm as lucky a father as they come.

Friday, June 15, 2007

Hitch on His Holiness

Here's Christopher Hitchens on Tibetan Buddhism and the Dalai Lama (my emphasis):

The Dalai Lama claims to be a hereditary god and a hereditary king. I don't think any decent person can assent to that proposition. You should take a look at what Tibet was like when it was run by the lamas. Buddhism has some of the same problems as Western religion. Zen was the official ideology of Hirohito's fascism that was used to conquer and reduce the rest of Asia to subservience. The current dictatorship in Burma is officially Buddhist. The Buddhist forces in Sri Lanka are the ones who began the horrific civil war there with their pogroms against the Tamils in the 1950s and 1960s. Lon Nol's army in Cambodia was officially Buddhist.

In all fairness to Hitchens, the inertial imperative he creates in his book God is Not Great simply sweeps him into a reckless indictment of Buddhism. Certainly Buddhism is a religion to the monastics who practice and live its rituals. But for everyone else, it's a way of life, a perspective on reality that clearly distinguishes it from the classic world religions. It's existence isn't invested in some dogma that it must protect at all costs. In fact, it is quite willing to discard any teachings if shown to be clearly in error. A case in point is its cosmology. The Dalai Lama has said many times it doesn't hold up in the face of modern discoveries. Further, what some dictatorships do in the name of Buddhism shouldn't reflect on Buddhism itself. If someone were to murder another in my name, I shouldn't be held accountable for that.

Worse though, Hitchens here simply misstates what the Dalai Lama claims. He does not claim to be a hereditary god or a hereditary king. His only claim is to be a humble Buddhist monk. True, he is also the Dalai Lama and the de facto head of state for the people of Tibet. It is a role he had to accept as a young child, and one that has been a huge burden on him his whole life. Certainly, millions of Buddhists treat him as a god or as a king, but he has never claimed to be either. That they do so is more a recognition of what a truly remarkable human being he is. Anyone who has spent time with His Holiness knows that there is no more humble person on the planet. He is a world treasure.

Pittsburgh Airport


Trying to pull from life.
Still trying to sketch in lines
peace.
Seeing glass holding air;
Will I know I was there?

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

The trickle of life


Mom and Dad managed to make Rachel's high school graduation; a truly supreme effort on their part and for which we are truly grateful. It meant a great deal to all of us. Poor Mom is really struggling. Dad talks quite a bit about how much weaker she has become and how life has lost its allure (well, I'm paraphrasing here). The slightest effort tires her out. The one thing that she still does is paint, though not as often as I would like. It gives her focus and meaning. It requires little physical effort. It takes her mind off her infirmities. When she's not painting, she is often in bed. It's not at all unusual for me to arrive on Tuesday's lunch with her there, either asleep or too weak to get up. I live in perpetual unease about another pratfall by either of them. That alone could end it. They have both had close calls. Dad is getting better about using his cane, but he remains cavalier about it.

Life trickles out of the elderly in spite of all the patches we use to stop the leaks. Death by old age is inexorable and utterly predictable. It is devoid of the red-hot anguish that turns the death of younger people into occasions of such abject grief. Instead, we just sit with our aging parents, hold their hand, and wait for the Bus. Meanwhile, I question how I will grieve when they're gone. I'm doing that now in the occasional melancholy I feel when I visit them inside their slowing orbit. But I know only the red-hot version of grief, so it's hard for me to tell what the cooler one feels like. Is this it?

Sunday, June 03, 2007

Brain dead

I think the last six years have revealed two things. First, that the American definition of "conservative" has little, if anything, to do with classical political theory (probably because Americans don't accept classical conservative theory; look at the Libertarian party). Second, that in defining their philosophy as "conservative," the Republicans have ensured that "conservative" principles as understood by Americans have lost their sheen for at least a generation of voters.

We have all watched the Republican party implode, Over the years, I have learned just how far they have strayed from ALL notions of conservative principles. Moreover, a true conservative can be wary of government without actively undermining its basic functions. But not this "conservative" administration, helped along with the active and public cooperation of the entire party apparatus.

So, Peggy Noonan's attempt to separate Bush from Republicans doesn't wash with me. I need not list all the forks in the road the Noonan Republicans could have taken where they could have claimed that Bush had left them and not the other way around. He and Cheney ARE the Republican party, however much their enablers want to claim otherwise. When Rudy McRomney gets some of their loudest cheers pledging to "double Gitmo" and leave wide latitude for "enhanced interrogation techniques," you know how far down the totalitarian abyss the Republican base has plunged.

Frankly, I think the Republican movement is brain dead. In fact, it's deeply ironic that Terri Schiavo became their cause ignomie. The party's Manichean view of foreign policy and military strategy is positively juvenile. How anyone could think we should entrust them with the reins of power again is beyond me.

Unlikely Couples

Quote of the day (from a review in Slate) about the movie "Crazy Love:"

Seven months later, with some help from creepily enabling friends, the couple were married in a Queens courtroom, and 33 years later, they're still together and as happy as any other squabbling, chain-smoking pair of certifiable lunatics.

Friday, June 01, 2007

Life speed


I have tried to instill in my daughters an understanding of just how fast life goes by. As my perspective has morphed from fatalism into Buddhism, what I meant about that hasn't really changed. It only deepened from a simple "enjoy the moment" to "live the moment in all of its miraculous intensity and beauty." I'm not sure if that deeper awareness came solely from age/wisdom or the happy coincidence of my brother introducing me to Buddhist teachings. It is important to know. If the former, Corey and Rachel will just have to wait until they "get it." If the latter, then they can learn it right now and live a fuller life. Judging from what they have told me, I think they have begun to feel it. That makes a father happy.